When I was five, my father passed away. I remember very little of my father and even less about the experience of losing him, yet I still feel a sadness and sense of loss. I am lucky to have 5 siblings who all help to reconstruct who my dad was (each with their own version of “dad”), ultimately helping to keep my father’s memory alive.

"Every day another innocent child is orphaned or sees terrible things children should never see. Who is taking care of the potentially enormous damage being done to a generation of children?"

- Sherif Karachatani, Psychology Professor, University of Sulaymaniya

 

Each day, around the world, children are losing significant loved ones due to war and violence. I was fortunate enough, that in my loss, I was surrounded by caring and supportive adults who were able to answer my questions and provide comfort. This is not always the case in war-torn countries. More often than they should, children are left to make sense of their loss of a significant loved-one and their grief on their own. In Iraq, thousands of children have witnessed extreme violence and death.  In a report from World Vision International, “43% of children have witnessed acts of violence and 39% have had someone close die due to violence.” (World Vision, 2007). The prolonged stress, such as grief and/or loss, may impair the cognitive development of young children.  While also impacting a young child’s biosocial development as significant caretakers, role models, and/or providers are no longer alive. A child may suffer feelings of isolation, depression, and have more difficulty with their emotional regulation. Many organizations are working in great effort to support and educate Iraqi children as Iraqi parents, teachers, and doctors express great concern over the “distress signals sent out by young people in their care - from nightmares and bedwetting to withdrawal, muteness, panic attacks and violence towards other children, sometimes even to their own parents.” (The Guardian, 2007).  These young children are witnessing and experiencing loss and are unable to fully accept or cope with their grief and fear.  Many groups believe that through educational programs and reestablishing of schools, Iraqi children will have the opportunity to rebuild and be provided the help and support they need to begin to recover.

The grief and sense of loss that l feel for my father is still present today. I am so thankful that I was provided with the support I needed to understand and cope. My hope is that the children of Iraq, and their families, will also find the help and support that they so desperately need.  

 

References

Berger, K. S. (2009). The developing person through childhood (5th ed.). New York, NY: Worth Publishers.

The Guardian. Children of war: The generation traumatised by violence in Iraq. (2007). Retrieved from http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2007/feb/06/iraq.topstories3

World Vision. Trapped! The Disappearing Hopes of Iraqi Refugee Children. (2007). Retrieved from http://www.worldvision.org/resources.nsf/main/iraqi_refugees_disappear_200706.pdf/$file/iraqi_refugees_disappear_200706.pdf?open&lid=CP_trapped